1060 Or honour from his death, to you "Twere policy and honour too,
To do as you resolved to do:
But, Sir, 'twould wrong your valour much
To say it needs, or fears a crutch.
1065 Great conquerors greater glory gain
By foes in triumph led, than slain:
The laurels that adorn their brows
Are pulled from living not dead boughs,
And living foes: the greatest fame
Of cripples slain can be but lame:
One half of him's already slain,
The other is not worth your pain;
Th' honour can but on one side light,
As worship did, when y' were dubbed knight.
Wherefore I think it better far
To keep him prisoner of war;
And let him fast in bonds abide,
At court of justice to be tried ;
Where if h' appear so bold or crafty,
1080 There may be danger in his safety:
If any member there dislike
His face, or to his beard have pique ·
Or if his death will save, or yield
Revenge or fright, it is revealed,
1085 Though he has quarter, ne'ertheless
Y' have power to hang him when you please;
This has been often done by some
Of our great conquerors, you know whom ;
And has by most of us been held
1090 Wise justice, and to some revealed:
For words and promises, that yoke
The conqueror, are quickly broke;
Like Samson's cuffs, though by his own
Direction and advice put on.
1095 For if we should fight for the Causo By rules of military laws,
And only do what they call just,
The Cause would quickly fall to dust.
This we among ourselves may speak;
But to the wicked or the weak
We must be cautious to declare
Perfection-truths, such as these are.'
This said, the high outrageous mettlo
Of knight began to cool and settle.
He liked the squire's advice, and soon
Resolved to see the business done;
And therefore charged him first to bind
Crowdero's hands on rump behind,
And to its former place, and use,
1110 The wooden member to reduce;
But force it take an oath before,
Ne'er to bear arms against him more.
Ralpho despatched with speedy haste,
And having tied Crowdero fast,
gave sir knight the end of cord, To lead the captive of his sword In triumph, while the steeds he caught, And them to further service brought. The squire in state rode on before, 1120 And on his nut-brown whinyard bore The trophy-fiddle and the case, Leaning on shoulder like a mace. The knight himself did after ride, Leading Crowdero by his side; And towed him, if he lagged behind, Like boat against the tide and wind. Thus grave and solemn they march on,
Until quite through the town they 'ad gone;
At further end of which there stands
An ancient castle, that commands
Th' adjacent parts; in all the fabric
You shall not see one stone nor a brick,
But all of wood, by powerful spell
Of magic made impregnable:
There's neither iron-bar nor gate,
Portcullis, chain, nor bolt, nor grate;
And yet men durance there abide,
In dungeon scarce three inches wide;
With roof so low, that under it
1140 They never stand, but lie or sit;
And yet so foul, that whoso is in,
Is to the middle-leg in prison;
In circle magical confined,
With walls of subtle air and wind, 1145 Which none are able to break thorough, Until they're freed by head of borough. Thither arrived, th' adventurous knight And bold squire from their steeds alight At th' outward wall, near which there stands 1150 A Bastile, built t' imprison hands;
By strange enchantment made to fetter
The lesser parts, and free the greater:
For tho' the body may creep through,
The hands in grate are fast enow:
And when a circle 'bout the wrist
Is made by beadle exorcist,
The body feels the spur and switch,
As if 'twere ridden post by witch
At twenty miles an hour pace,
1160 And yet ne'er stirs out of the place.
On top of this there is a spire,
On which sir knight first bids the squire
The fiddle, and its spoils, the case,
In manner of a trophy, place.
1165 That done, they ope the trap-door gate,
And let Crowdero down thereat.
Crowdero making doleful face,
Like hermit poor in pensive place,'
To dungeon they the wretch commit,
And the survivor of his feet;
But th' other that had broke the peace,
And head of knighthood, they release,
Though a delinquent false and forged,
Yet being a stranger, he's enlarged;
While his comrade, that did no hurt,
Is clapped up fast in prison for 't.
So justice, while she winks at crimes,
Stumbles on innocence sometimes.
The scattered rout return and rally,
Surround the place; the knight does sally,
And is made prisoner: then they seize
Th' enchanted fort by storm, release
Crowdero, and put the squire in 's place:
I should have first said Hudibras.
Y me! what perils do environ
The man that meddles with cold iron !
What plaguy mischiefs and mishaps
Do dog him still with after-claps !
5 For though dame Fortune seem to smile,
And leer upon him for a while,
She'll after show him, in the nick
Of all his glories, a dog-trick.
This any man may sing or say
10 I' th' ditty called, 'What if a day?'
For Hudibras, who thought he 'ad won
The field, as certain as a gun,
And having routed the whole troop,
With victory was cock-a-hoop;
15 Thinking he 'ad done enough to purchase Thanksgiving-day among the churches, Wherein his mettle and brave worth
Might be explained by holder-forth,
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