I. Diogenes commissions Polydeukes, about to return to
the upper world, to inform Menippus of the actual
condition of things in the land of shades, and to
deliver admonitory messages to various sorts of men
-the rich, the powerful, the proud; and, finally, to
the poor, whom, when they complain of their lot on
earth, he is to console by representing the complete
equality (iooripua) which prevails in the regions of
the dead
II. Krœsus, Midas, and Sardanapalus complain to Pluto
of Menippus that he derides them for their lamenta-
tions over the loss of the power, wealth, and luxury
which belonged to them on earth. Menippus, in spite
of Pluto's remonstrances, persists in his ridicule
III. Menippus ridicules the oracles of Trophonius and Am-
philochus
IV. Hermes demands from Charon arrears of payment due
to him for his services on the Styx. Charon excuses
himself on the plea of bad times; no great war or
famine, as it happened, ravaging the earth at that
moment. Hermes moralizes on the causes of death,
different from those of old, which despatch men in
crowds to Hades.
one to the other their fates, in having been in the
midst of their scheming unexpectedly dismissed to
Hades. Kallidemides, in particular, recounts the
pleasant manner in which he brought about his own
death.
VIII. Knemon, a legacy-hunter, laments to his neighbour
Damnippus, that, whereas he had publicly, in his
will, bequeathed all his wealth to the millionaire
Hermolaus, in the expectation that the latter would
reciprocate the benefit, he, the speculating testator,
by his sudden death, had been frustrated of all his
hopes, and, besides, had left his family destitute . 101
IX. Polystratus, a centenarian plutocrat, upon arriving in
Hades, narrates to his friend Simylus how, by reason
of his great wealth, he had enjoyed the adulation of
the world and an abundance of gifts from speculating
flatterers, and how he had disappointed them all by
his will
X. An alarming number of ghosts crowd to the Styx.
Charon, fearing for his boat, directs Hermes to see
that they were entirely stripped of their various
insignia of power, rank, wealth, and the weighty
load of vices, before they are admitted on board.
Menippus, who is one of the passengers, avails him-
self of the opportunity for ridiculing and railing at
the bewailing ghosts
XI. Krates and Diogenes, meeting in Hades, indulge their
satire on the subject of the fates of two millionaire
merchants (cousins) who had been constantly plot-
ting, in the usual manner, each for the other's
legacy, and who had both perished on the same day
by shipwreck. The two eminent Cynics congratu-
late themselves on the recollection of the very diffe-
rent character of their own objects in life
XII. Alexander of Macedon and Hannibal, quarrelling for
precedence, submit the arbitrament of their cause
to Minos. Each recounts his exploits. Scipio, the
conqueror of Carthage, intervenes, and pronounces
in favour of Alexander, claiming the second place for
himself, and assigning the third place to Hannibal. 114
XIII. Diogenes jeers at Alexander of Macedon for his late
pretensions to divinity, at the same time satirizing
the servile attitude of the conquered Greek States to-
wards him. He proceeds to remind the arrogant
conqueror of all his vain power and glory, and casts
large part of the blame on Alexander's preceptor,
Aristotle, for flattering and fostering the pride and
ambition of his pupil. Diogenes, finally, recom-
mends the dead potentate to drink the waters of the
river Lethe
XIV. Philip, King of Macedon, ridicules his son Alexan-
der's absurd arrogance in claiming to be the son of
Ammon, and calls in question the greatness of his
military achievements. Alexander defends him-
self.
XV. Antilochus, the son of Nestor (one of the Greek heroes
who fell during the siege of Ilium), remonstrates
with his friend Achilleus for having given utterance
to the words put into his mouth by the poet of the
Odyssey-that he would rather be a slave on earth
than king in Hades-shows him the uselessness of
regrets in the under-world, and, at the same time,
attempts to console him with the reflection that he
is far from being alone in his fate. Achilleus
takes the admonition of his friend in good part,
but refuses to be comforted
XVI. Diogenes, the Cynic, expresses his astonishment to
Herakles at seeing the son of Zeus in Hades, like
the rest. That hero pretends that his actual self
is in heaven, while it is his eidolon, or phantom,
which is among the dead
XVII. Menippus derides the fable and fate of Tantalus
XVIII. Menippus desires Hermes to point out to him the
beautiful women and handsome men celebrated by
the poets. Hermes shows him the ghosts of the
most famous of them, and, in particular, that of
Helene. Menippus cynically expresses his aston-
ishment that a bare skull should have caused a
great war, and the deaths of so many thousands
XIX. Protesilaus, one of the victims of the Trojan War,
seeks to avenge himself by an assault on Helene-
Eakus, gatekeeper and one of the high court of
justice in Hades, reminds him that it is Menelaus,
the commander-in-chief of the Achæan army against
Ilium, who is the proper object of his vengeance.
Menelaus shifts the responsibility to the shoulders
of Paris. Paris lays the blame upon Eros. Æakus
decides that Protesilaus has only himself to blame
for preferring military glory to a young and beau-
tiful wife; but concedes to Protesilaus that the
blame, in the last resort, lies with the Fates
XX. Eakus, at the especial request of Menippus, intro-
duces him to the ghosts of the most celebrated
potentates of antiquity, when the Cynic avails
himself of his opportunity for ridicule and derision.
Menippus is next introduced to the most famous
philosophers, whom he treats with not much
greater consideration. The dialogue concludes with
an interview with Socrates, whose foibles, real or
pretended, are made the subject of satire
XXI. Menippus inquires of Kerberus, the canine guardian
of the entrance to Hades, as to the demeanour
of Sokrates upon his first arrival there
XXII. Charon demands from Menippus his accustomed
fee. Upon the absolute refusal of the Cynic to
pay, a lively altercation ensues
XXIII. Protesilaus, an Achæan hero, who had fallen before
Ilium, supplicates Pluto to permit him to return
to life, for a day, to visit his wife Laodameia, and
adduces as precedents the examples of Orpheus
and Alkestis. At the intercession of Persephone,
Pluto at length grants the favour
XXIV. Diogenes demands of Mausolus, the Karian satrap,
the reason of his arrogance and pride, and ridi-
cules the vanity of his grandeur and power on
earth, and, in particular, the uselessness to him
of his magnificent tomb at Halikarnassus. He
concludes his diatribe with contrasting his own
complete ignorance and indifference in regard
even to the manner, or place, of his own sepul-
ture
XXV. Nireus and Thersites, disputing which of them was
the more distinguished by good looks, appeal to
Menippus. Menippus, disregarding the autho-
rity of Homer, pronounces the ioorallos as well
as the iooripia, in Hades, to be as complete as it
is unalterable
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