Warkworth. Before Northumberland's castle. Enter Rumour, painted full of tongues. Rum. Open your ears; For which of you will stop The vent of hearing, when loud Rumour speaks? Hath beaten down young Hotspur, and his troops, To noise abroad,-that Harry Monmouth fell (1) Northumberland's castle. Mouldy, Shadow, Wart, Feeble, and Bullealf, recruits. Fang and Snare, sheriff's officers. A Dancer, speaker of the Epilogue. Lady Northumberland. Lady Percy. Lords and other attendants; officers, soldiers, mes- This have I rumour'd through the peasant towns They bring smooth comforts false, worse than true [Exit, wrongs. 412 And, in the fortune of my lord your son, North. How is this deriv'd? Saw you the field? came you from Shrewsbury? A gentleman well bred, and of good name, On Tuesday last to listen after news, Bard, My lord, I over-rode him on the way; North. Now, Travers, what good tidings come Tra. My lord, sir John Umfrevile turn'd me back North. Said he, young Harry Percy's spur was cold? Had met ill luck? Bard. My lord, I'll tell you what If my young lord your son has not the day, Upon mine honour, for a silken point I give my barony: never talk of it. Your brother, thus; so fought the noble Douglas; North. He, that but fears the thing he would not know, I Bard. I cannot think, my lord, your son is dead, North. Why should the gentleman, that rode by Turn'd on themselves, like dull and heavy lead. Travers, Give then such instances of loss? Bard. He was some hilding fellow, that had stol'n North. Yea, this man's brow, like to a title-leaf, So dull, so dead in look, so wo-begone, (1) Exhausted. (3) Hilderling, base, cowardly. And as the thing that's heavy in itself, North. For this I shall have time enough to mourn, Like strengthless hinges, buckle under life Out of his keeper's arms; even so my limbs, A scaly gauntlet now, with joints of steel, Tra. This strained passion doth you wrong, my lord. Bard. Sweet earl, divorce not wisdom from your honour. Mor. The lives of all your loving complices Lean on your health; the which, if you give o'er To stormy passion, must perforce decay. You cast the event of war, my noble lord, Derives from heaven his quarrel, and his cause; Fal. Sirrah, you giant, what says the doctor to my water? Page. He said, sir, the water itself was a good healthy water: but, for the party that owed' it, he might have more diseases than he knew for. Fal. Men of all sorts take a pride to gird at me; The brain of this foolish-compounded clay, man, is not able to vent any thing that tends to laughter, more than I invent, or is invented on me: I am not only witty in myself, but the cause that wit is in other men. I do here walk before thee, like a sow, that hath o'erwhelmed all her litter but one. If the prince put thee into my service for any other reason than to set me off, why then I have no judgment. Thou whoreson mandrake, thou art fitter to be And summ'd the account of chance, before you worn in my cap, than to wait at my heels. I was said, Let us make head. It was your presurmise, Bard. We all, that are engaged to this loss, I hear for certain, and do speak the truth,-- With well-appointed powers; he is a man, Suppos'd sincere and holy in his thoughts, Of fair king Richard, scrap'd from Pomfret stones; never manned with an agate1o till now: but I will set you neither in gold nor silver, but in vile apparel, and send you back again to your master, for a jewel; the juvenal, the prince your master, whose chin is not yet fledged. I will sooner have a beard grow in the palm of my hand, than he shall get one on his cheek; and yet he will not stick to say, his face is a face royal: God may finish it when he will, it is not a hair amiss yet: he may keep it still as a face-royal, for a barber shall never earn sixpence out of it; and yet he will be crowing, as if he had writ man ever since his father was a bachelor. He may keep his own grace, but he is almost out of mine, I can assure him.—— What said master Dumbleton about the satin, for my short cloak, and slops? Page. He said, sir, you should procure him better assurance than Bardolph: he would not take his bond and yours; he liked not the security. Fal. Let him be damned like a glutton! may his tongue be hotter!-A whoreson Achitophel! a rascally yea-forsooth knave! to bear a gentleman in hand, and ther stand upon security!-The whoreson smooth-pates do now wear nothing but high shoes, and bunches of keys at their girdles; and if a man is thorough" with them in honest taking up, then they must stand upon-security. I had as lief they would put ratsbane in my mouth, as offer to stop it with security. I looked he should have sent me two and twenty yards of satin, as I am a true knight, and he sends me security. Well, he may sleep in security; for he hath the horn of abundance, and the lightness of his wife shines through it: and yet cannot he see, though he have his own lantern to light him.--Where's Bardolph? Page. He's gone into Smithfield, to buy your worship a horse. Fal. I bought him in Paul's, and he'll buy me a horse in Smithfield: an I could get me but a wife (9) A root supposed to have the shape of a man. (10) A little figure cut in an agate. (11) In their debt. Ch. Just. I think, you are fallen into the disease; for you hear not what I say to you. please you, it is the disease of not listening, the Fal. Very well, my lord, very well: rather, an't malady of not marking, that I am troubled withal. Ch. Just. To punish you by the heels, would amend the attention of your ears; and I care not, if I become your physician. in the stews, I were manned, horsed, and wived.'| Enter the Lord Chief Justice, and an attendant. Page. Sir, here comes the nobleman that committed the prince for striking him about Bardolph. Fal. Wait close; I will not see him. Ch. Just. What's he that goes there? Atten. Falstaff, an't please your lordship. Ch. Just. He that was in question for the robbery? Atten. He, my lord but he hath since done patient: your lordship may minister the potion of Fal. I am as poor as Job, my lord; but not so good service at Shrewsbury; and, as I hear, is imprisonment to me, in respect of poverty; but now going with some charge to the lord John of how I should be your patient to follow your pre Lancaster. Ch. Just. What, to York? Call him back again. scruple, or, indeed, a scruple itself. scriptions, the wise may make some dram of a Atten. Sir John Falstaff! Fal. Boy, tell him, I am deaf. Page. You must speak louder, my master is deaf. Ch. Just. I am sure, he is, to the hearing of any thing good.-Go, pluck him by the elbow; I must speak with him. Atten. Sir John, Ch. Just. I sent for you, when there were mat sel in the laws of this land-service, I did not come. Ch. Just. Your means are very slender, and Fal. What! a young knave, and beg! Is there not wars? is there not employment? Doth not the king lack subjects? do not the rebels need soldiers? Though it be a shame to be on any side your waste is great. but one, it is worse shame to beg than to be on the worst side, were it worse than the name of rebel-means were greater, and my waist slenderer. lion can tell how to make it. Atten. You mistake me, sir. Fal. Why, sir, did I say you were an honest man? setting my knighthood and my soldiership aside, I had lied in my throat if I had said so. Alten. pray you, sir, then set your knighthood and your soldiership aside; and give me leave to tell you, you lie in your throat, if you say I am any other than an honest man. Fal. give thee leave to tell me so! I lay aside that which grows to me! If thou gett'st any leave of me, hang me; if thou takest leave, thou wert better be hanged: You hunt-counter, hence! avaunt! Atten. Sir, my lord would speak with you. Ch. Just. Sir John Falstaff, a word with you. Fal. My good lord!-God give your lordship good time of day. I am glad to see your lordship abroad: I heard say, your lordship was sick: hope your lordship goes abroad by advice. Your Jordship, though not clean past your youth, hath yet some smack of age in you, some relish of the saltness of time; and I most humbly beseech your lordship, to have a reverend care of your health. I Fal. I would it were otherwise; I would my Ch. Just. You have misled the youthful prince. the fellow with the great belly, and he my dog. Fal. The young prince hath misled me: I am Ch. Just. Well, I am loath to gall a new-healed little gilded over your night's exploit on Gads-hill: wound; your day's service at Shrewsbury hath a you may thank the unquiet time for your quiet o'er. posting that action. Fal. My lord? not a sleeping wolf. Fal. To wake a wolf, is as bad as to smell a fox. Ch. Just. What! you are as a candle, the better part burnt out. Fal. A wassel' candle, my lord; all tallow: if truth. did say of wax, my growth would approve the Ch. Just. There is not a white hair on your face, but should have his effect of gravity. Fal. His effect of gravy, gravy, gravy. down, like his ill angel. Ch. Just. You follow the young prince up and Fal. Not so, my lord; your ill angel is light; Ch. Just. Sir John, I sent for you before your without weighing: and yet, in some respects, I but, I hope, he that looks upon me, will take me expedition to Shrewsbury. Fal. An't please your lordship, I hear, his ma- little regard in these coster-monger times, that true grant, I cannot go, I cannot tell: Virtue is of so jesty is returned with some discomfort from Wales. valour is turned bear-herd: Pregnancy is made a Ch. Just. I talk not of his majesty:-You would tapster, and hath his quick wit wasted in giving not come when I sent for you. reckonings: all the other gifts appertinent to man, Fal. And I hear moreover, his highness is fallen as the malice of this age shapes them, are not into this same whoreson apoplexy. Ch. Just. Well, heaven mend him! I pray, me speak with you. worth a gooseberry. You, that are old, consider let not the capacities of us that are young: you measure the heat of our livers with the bitterness of Fal. This apoplexy is, as I take it, a kind of your galls: and we that are in the vaward' of our lethargy, an't please your lordship; a kind of sleep-youth, I must confess, are wags too. ing in the blood, a whoreson tingling. Ch. Just. Do you set down your name in the Ch. Just. What tell you me of it? be it as it is. scroll of youth, that are written down old with all Fal. It hath its original from much grief; from the characters of age? Have you not a moist eye? study, and perturbation of the brain: I have read a dry hand? a yellow cheek? a white beard? a the cause of his effects in Galen; it is a kind of decreasing leg? an increasing belly? Is not your deafness. voice broken? your wind short? your chin double? (1) Alluding to an old proverb: Who goes to Westminster for a wife, to St. Paul's for a man, and to Smithfield for a horse, may meet with a whore, a knave, and a jade. (2) A catch-pole or bum-bailiff. (5) Pass current. (7) Forepart, |