We fquander there an Hour or more;
And then all Hands, Boys, to the Oar;
All, heteroclite Dan except,
Who never Time, nor Order kept,
But by peculiar Whimsies drawn,
Peeps in the Ponds to look for Spawn;
O'erfees the Work, or * Dragon rows,
Or mars a Text, or mends his Hofe;
Or but proceed we in our Journal-
At Two, or after, we return all.
From the four Elements affembling,
Warn'd by the Bell, all Folks come trembling:
From airy Garrets fome defcend,
Some from the Lake's remoteft End:
My Lord and Dean the Fire forsake;
Dan leaves the earthly Spade and Rake:
The Loit'rers quake, no Corner hides them,
And Lady Betty foundly chides them.
Now Water's brought, and Dinner's done;
With Church and King the Lady's gone:
(Not reck❜ning half an Hour we pass
In talking o'er a moderate Glass.)
Dan, growing drowsy, like a Thief
Steals off to dofe away his Beef;
And this must pass for reading Hammond-
While George and Dean go to Back-Gammon.
George, Nim, and Dean fet out at Four,
And then again, Boys, to the Oar.
My Lord Chief Baron's smaller Boat.
But when the Sun goes to the Deep,
(Not to disturb him in his Sleep,
Or make a Rumbling o'er his Head,
His Candle out, and He a-bed)
We watch his Motions to a Minute,
And leave the Flood, when he
goes in it.
Now ftinted in the fhort'ning Day,
We go to Pray'rs, and then to Play :
Till Supper comes, and after that,
We fit an Hour to drink and chat.
'Tis late-the old and younger Pairs,
By * Adam lighted, walk up Stairs.
The weary Dean goes to his Chamber,
And Nim and Dan to Garret clamber.
So, when this Circle we have run,
The Curtain falls, and all is done.
I MIGHT have mention'd fev'ral Facts,
Like Episodes between the Acts;
And tell who loses, and who wins,
Who gets a Cold, who breaks his Shins;
How Dan caught nothing in his Net,
And how the Boat was overfet,
For Brevity I have retrench'd,
How in the Lake the Dean was drench'd.
It would be an Exploit to brag on,
How valiant George rode o'er the Dragon;
How steady in the Storm he fat,
And fav'd his Oar, but loft his Hat.
How Nim (no Hunter e'er could match him)
Still brings us Hares, when he can catch 'em :-
How fkilfully Dan mends his Nets;
How Fortune fails him, when he fets.
Or, how the Dean delights to vex
The Ladies, and lampoon the Sex.
Or, how our Neighbour lifts his Nose,
To tell what ev'ry School-Boy knows,
And, with his Finger on his Thumb
Explaining, ftrikes Oppofers dumb:
Or how his Wife, that Female Pedant,
(But now there need no more be faid on't,)
Shews all her Secrets of House-keeping;
For Candles how the trucks her Dripping;
Was forc'd to fend three Miles for Yeft
To brew her Ale, and raise her Pafte;
Tells ev'ry Thing that you can think of:
How the cur'd Tommy of the Chin-cough;
What gave her Brats and Pigs the Meazles.
And how her Doves were kill'd by Weezles,
How Fowler howl'd, and what a Fright
She had with Dreams the other Night.
BUT now, fince I have gone fo far on, A Word or two of * Lord Chief Baron;
And tell how little Weight he fets
On all Whig Papers, and Gazettes ;
But for the Politicks of* Pue,
Thinks every Syllable is true.
And fince he owns the King of Sweden
Is dead at last, without evading;
Now all his Hopes are in the Czar ;
Why, Mufcovy is not fo far;
"Down the Black Sea, and up the Streights, "And in a Month he's at your Gates:
Perhaps from what the Packet brings
By Christmas we fhall fee ftrange Things."
WHY fhould I tell of Ponds and Drains, What Carps we met with for our Pains ; Of Sparrows tam'd, and Nuts innumerable, To choak the Girls, and to confume a Rabble? But you, who are a Scholar, know,
How tranfient all Things are below;
How prone to change is human Life ;
Laft Night arrived + Clem and his Wife
This grand Event hath broke our Measures;
Their Reign began with cruel Seizures:
The Dean must with his Quilt supply
The Bed, in which those Tyrants lie:
Nim loft his Wig-block, Dan his Jordan;
(My Lady fays fhe can't afford one)
* A Tory News-Writer. † Mr. CLEMENT BARRY.
George is half fcar'd out of his Wits,
For Clem gets all the tiny Bits.
Henceforth expect a different Survey;
This House will foon turn Topfy-turvey.
They talk of further Alterations,
Which causes many Speculations.
Upon the horrid PLOT, difcovered by Harlequin the B-p of R-ch-r's
In a DIALOGUE between a WHIG and a
Written in the Year 1722.
ASK'D a Whig the other Night,
How came this wicked Plot to Light:
He answer'd, that a Dog of late
Inform'd a Minister of State.
Said I, from thence I nothing know;
For, are not all Informers fo?
A Villain, who his Friend betrays,
We style him by no other Phrase;
And fo a perjur'd Dog denotes
PORTER, and PRENDERGAST, and OATES.
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