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MATHEWS AND HIS NAMESAKE.

A man well known through the provinces as "Irish Mathews," travelled from about 1815 until 1832 with an entertainment entitled "Mathews at Home." He was, of course, continually mistaken for the real Simon Pure, but as Mathews was his genuine patronymic, he replied to all remonstrances, "Get out of that entirely; why will I change it? Wasn't it my father's name? Let t'other chap" (meaning the renowned Charles) "change his." To all requests to omit the words, "At Home," he replied with similar ingenuity.

Irish Mathews was a man of great muscular power, and among his other "vocal performances," lifted an anvil from the ground by fastening it to the hair of his head by whipcord. He had shoulders of like ample dimensions, and was altogether a handsome fellow. On one occasion the Mathews arrived at Norwich, and to his great dismay saw the Irish jintleman's bills stuck all over the town. "Hang this impostor!" said Charles; "I'll kick him, sure as he's born, I will-I'll kick him out of the place." The more Mathews thought of it, the more resolved he became to perform the

aforesaid operation upon the person of his namesake. Y

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who was with him, thinking to make the impostor's shame more certain, advised him to go to the performance that night, and declare himself, then and there, to kick out the intruder. "The justice of it pleases me," quoted Mathews, and together they went, paid for admission, and entered the place; the hero of a thousand "At Homes" reiterating to his companion, "I'll try to kick him—don't try to prevent me—I will kick him." At the moment they entered the exhibition-room the Irish jintleman had just concluded his feat of strength, and was putting away the anvil with as much apparent ease as Mathews could lift a chair. This, to say nothing of the "brawny shoulders four feet square" of the exhibitor, was enough. "Come along, my dear fellow," exclaimed Mathews, "it isn't worth while to make a disturbance; he's a low fellow, you see, beneath my notice."

ACCIDENTS TO MR. MATHEWS.

"There seemed," says Mrs. Mathews, "a fatality attending all my husband's movements from home. How many severe and dangerous accidents did he encounter in the course of his life!

First in Ireland, in 1794, he was almost drowned (I might almost say actually, for he suffered all the pains of such a death), and was taken out of the water in a state of total insensibility. In 1801 a heavy platform fell upon him while acting, and he was taken off the stage as dead. In 1803 he was violently thrown from his horse at a review, and was threatened with dangerous consequences. In 1807, when on a shooting party, his gun burst and shattered his hand, and he was weeks after under a surgeon's care. In 1814 he was thrown out of his tilbury, and became lame for life! In 1817 another horse fell going down a steep hill in a tilbury, and Mr. Mathews was thrown over the animal's head and severely cut and bruised. In 1827, while in a floating bath at Brighton, the 'life-preserver' turned round and forced him. upon his face, in which position he must have been suffocated had not a gentleman witnessed the accident and rescued him. from his danger. In the year 1829 the roller of the dropscene on the Plymouth stage fell upon his head while At Home' there; he was taken up to all appearance dead, and remained many minutes in a state of insensibility. Four years after this, precisely the same accident occurred in the Devonport theatre and with the same results! In 1833, while returning from an evening walk, a large dog ran between his legs and knocked him down with a violent shock. This accident again placed him under a surgeon's hands. A few weeks after, while recovering from this hurt, another dog threw him off a garden-seat, and painfully injured his hand and wrist. But the last trial was the most severe since that of 1814.

"When all these accidents are remembered, it would appear that he bore about him little less than a 'charmed life.' That he escaped as he did, twice from the curtain peril, was miraculous, when we consider the impetus given to the roller of the drop-scene as it falls.

"The situation in which he found himself on Salisbury Plain, the last of his 'accidents by flood and field,' was quite as memorable as that which injured his bodily health for life; that left a lasting personal evidence of its severitythis an indelible impression on his mind. Let those who marvel at the stress laid on this last peril travel over that dreary waste in the month of November, in severe weather; let them imagine their limbs helpless and in pain from accumulated injuries, and then, after the agitation of such a

misadventure, let them reflect on its possible consequences to himself, on the approach of night, with a possibility of not being discovered by his absent friend when he returned to seek him on a plain where there was scarcely a distinguishing feature to mark the spot on which he had left him."-Charles Mathews's Life and Recollections.

MATHEWS'S INCOME TAX.

Charles Mathews had some experience of the Income Tax Commissioners during his early career at York, and devised a comic expedient to obtain for himself a mitigation of their assessment. This expedient was a formal enumeration to the commissioners of the professional outgoings by which his salary was diminished. For example :—

"Black wigs, white wigs, brown wigs, red wigs; bush wigs, tye wigs, bob wigs, bishops' wigs; wigs with a tail, wigs without a tail; lawyers' wigs, judges' wigs, parsons' wigs, powdered wigs; old men's wigs, young men's wigs, &c.Natural heads of hair: namely, red hair, gray hair, flaxen hair, brown hair, black hair, Quakers' hair, country-men's hair; and bald heads of every description. Beards, whiskers,. mustachios, eyebrows, &c.-Old men's shoes, young men's shoes, velvet shoes, leather shoes, gouty shoes, dancing shoes, hobnail shoes, square-toed shoes, round-toed shoes, &c." After these regular requisites were given, came the miscellaneous part of his stock; such as "hats, feathers, caps, cravats, stocks, ruffles, frills, neckerchiefs, pocket-handkerchiefs, pens, books, ink, paper, music-paper, red-ochre, rouge, carmine, hair-powder, wax candles, Indian ink, camel's hair pencils, hare's feet, whiting, burnt corks, cold cream, soap, and huckaback towels."

The list, of which this is but a short extract, covered many sheets of paper. For a few minutes the commissioners listened gravely, but peals of laughter presently broke forth; and Mathews heard no more of the income tax during his residence at York.

CHEAP LIVING.

Mathews, in his Adelphi entertainments, used to tell an excellent story of what would be called, in the workhouse phrase, the dietary system of two Frenchmen who rambled their way to live on their wits in London. The Frenchmen, on finding their finances on which they were expected to live

for a year running to the dregs within a week in the expenses of London, determined to separate, for the purpose of greater economy. At the end of a month they met by accident; Monsieur Jean stared at the sight of Monsieur Pierre, as if he were an apparition. Monsieur Pierre gazed on Monsieur Jean with a mixture of envy and astonishment, for Monsieur Jean had become as corpulent as an alderman, while Monsieur Pierre was reduced to skin and bone.

"Ma foi," said the starving Pierre, "how is all this? I am half starved. For the last fortnight I have lived on bread and water; while you look as round as a burgomaster."

"The matter is easily explained," said Monsieur Jean; "I live on a delightful thing that costs me only four sous a day.” "Ma foi," said the starving Pierre, "tell me what it is. What do they call it?"

"What it is I don't know," was the answer ; "but they

called it cat's-meat."

But we think the following expedient for cheap living nearly equal to the discovery of Monsieur Jean. The recipe is given as the substance of a book written by Dr. Alcott, a physician of Salem :- "For breakfast, take two cents' worth (a halfpenny) of dried apples, without drink; for dinner, drink a quart of water, to swell the apples; take tea with a friend." This, we have no doubt, is a capital recipe to bring patients to the doctor, though we think some other word than substance should be used in its description.

MATHEWS AND THE SILVER SPOON.

Amongst Mathews's pranks of younger days, that is to say, when he first came from York to the Haymarket Theatre, he was invited, with F—— and some other performers, to dine with Mr. A——, now an eminent silversmith, but who, at that period, followed the business of a pawnbroker. It so happened that A--- was called out of the parlour, at the back of the shop, during dinner. Mathews, with wonderful celerity, altering his hair, countenance, hat, &c., took a large gravy-spoon off the dinner-table, ran instantly into the street, entered one of the little dark doors leading to the pawnbroker's counter, and actually pledged to the unconscious Aown gravy-spoon. Mathews contrived with equal rapidity to return and seat himself (having left the street-door open) before A- re-appeared at the dinner-table. As a matter

his

of course, this was made the subject of a wager. An éclaircissement took place before the party broke up, to the infinite astonishment of A▬▬▬▬▬▬

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A FIERI FACIAS.

Charles Mathews one day arrived at a forlorn-looking country inn, and addressing a lugubrious waiter, inquired if he could have a chicken and asparagus. The mysterious serving-man shook his head. “Can I have a duck, then ?”No, sir." "Have you any mutton-chops ?"-" Not one, sir." Then, as you have no eatables, bring me something to drink. Have you any spirits ?"—" Sir," returned the man with a profound sigh, we are out of spirits." "Then in wonder's name what have you got in the house?"-"An execution, sir."

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MATHEWS MISGUIDED.

During a debate on the Irish question Mathews was a constant attendant at the House of Commons. He took his station under the gallery, by permission of the Speaker. The debate being usually carried on to a late hour, his friend, Mr. Parratt, of Milbank, offered him a bed at his house. One night, on his way to Milbank, having got half way home, he was from fatigue, arising from his lameness, compelled to rest against a post. Many persons knew that Mathews had many antipathies, such as one year hating mutton, and eating nothing but beef, and the next disliking beef, and eating nothing but mutton. Among other things he had a great dislike to the jingling of keys, or the rattling of money in another person's pocket. On the present occasion he had partially recovered himself, and was hesitating whether it were better to proceed or to return, that is, to return to the coach-stand in Palace Yard, or to go to Mr. Parratt's, when he heard a sound like the rattling of keys close to him, and, turning round to see whence it came, he beheld a tall man, wearing a great coat reaching down to his heels, who civilly inquired if he was ill, and whether he could afford him any assistance. told him where he was going, and that he was lame; the stranger offered him his arm, which he accepted. They had not proceeded many yards when the same jingling noise again arrested Mathews's attention, which his new friend perceiving, advised a slower pace, which being adopted, the unwelcome

Mathews

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