VOL. I.-No. 34.]

COMMON NOVEL READERS.

THERE are certainly no such people as common novel readers: there might have been thirty or forty years ago, before the march of intellect began, but now we are all too enlightened for such promiscuous devouring of the trash of the circulating library. Novels are now only read as a relief to severer studies, or as a philoso phical and psychological study. Ah-well-people say, and flatter themselves that intellect is marching right onwards, and that the world's an university, and the men and women merely students. Moonshine! The common novel reader is as common a creature as ever -and perhaps more so, inasmuch as reading is more common. In fact, almost all readers are common novel readers; they may deny it if they will, but they can't disprove it. Yes, Sir, you are one of those wise people who never read novels at all, and, of course, you cannot be a common novel reader because you don't even read the uncommon novels. With all due deference, permit me to say 'Fudge!' You are as fond of a novel as the best or the worst of common novel readers; only you don't take it in the shape of a novel. You are like the good people of the Temperance Society, who say pawpaw to a glass of brandy and water, but have no objection to gulp brandified wines. All reading is divisible into two classes,-of matter, and of mind. He who reads of matter, and meddles not with mind, is the student of physical philosophy; he is absorbed with gases, with acids, with alkalis, with circles, with squares, with sines, with lines, with tangents, with shapes and colors of all shades and sizes-he is not a common novel reader; his soul is as dry as dust; and he looks as wise as a stuffed alligator; he is a man of science; he gloats over a pennyworth of conchology, and calls it the march of intellect; he knows that the moon is not a piece of green cheese, and therein he thinks himself much wiser than his ancestors, who labored under some errors concerning that planet; he travels by steam-boats, and is learned on the subject of pistons, therefore he has attained to a high degree of legislatorial [No. 19, NEW SERIES.]

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wisdom, and is competent to set the world on its legs, which has all this time been standing on its head, for mere lack of pantology. Bless the wiseacre! he shall not be reproached with the sin of common novel reading; he has not the taste for it, nor the apprehension of its meaning. But the other kind of reading is that which has reference to mind and human feelings, emotions, interests, or passions; and it is in this class that we find common novel readers in great abundance. For what is the charm of a common novel? Wherein consists the fascination with which it wins, binds, and fetters the mind? Is it because it is false?-No. cause it is stupid?-No. Because it is improbable-impossible-irrational?-No. It is because it brings us to an acquaintance more or less perfect with the passions and feelings and interests of the human heart. The taste for novel reading is founded on the principle so prettily expressed by Terence :

Homo sum; humani nihil a me alienum puto.

Be

But some people gratify their propensity for gossip, and for human curiosity, by reading only history, biography, travels and voyages, and thereupon they plume themselves on their love of solid reading. Solid fiddlestick! I remember seeing at a glass door of some circulating library in the suburbs, a list of books lent to read: there was not a single novel in the list-it was all biography, or memoirs, or travels, or poetry-any thing but novels. Villanous affectation! It is just upon a par with those hypocritical tramps who grind psalm tunes on a barrel organ. I don't give away many pence-I have not many to give-but I make it an invariable rule never to give a copper to a psalm grinder; nor would I ever be a subscriber to a circulating library that should affect the prudery of not circulating novels. What are histories but royal romances? and what are novels but domestic histories? But people read history for instruction. Well, I do not deny that a journeyman linen-draper may gain much instruction from reading Tacitus he may learn that if he should ever come to be emperor of the civilised world, and should be as arbitrary and tyrannical as Nero was, he will cut just as contemptible a figure in history. But if that said linen

NOTICES.

"S. W., NEWCASTLE."-Our Correspondent's favor has been received. The article entitled "FLESH and BLOOD" is in type, but we cannot say exactly when it will be inserted. "GREAT THINGS IN IDLE MOMENTS" is under consideration. To the query respecting the other lee-tle affair, we would say "all is going on well." Mr. DRYDEN'S Letter has been received. We shall be happy to see this gentleman, and to render him any service in our power. We are quite satisfied with what he says respecting the reason of his appearance in public, and cannot but commend his motive.

THE THEATRES.

"See that the Players be well used."-Hamlet.

no

Othello.

Covent Garden.-There is a prevailing "fashion" among theatricals, as well as other things; and the present fashion is, for the two principal establishments to play the same pieces every night till Christmas. Amilie; or, the Love Test, and Joan of Arc, are announced for, and have been played almost every night since their production, and both with encreased success; the music of the former, in particular, pleases by repetition. Monday is the only evening in the week on which the performances are partially changed,-Macbeth being substituted for the new opera. The cast of this favorite play is such, that the house is always crowded when it is performed. Every singer of merit is pressed into the service, and the chorusses are, in consequence, both strong and effective. MACREADY is now "putting money in his purse," and he deserves it, for he has exerted himself greatly to please the public.

Drury Lane.-BALFE'S opera of Joan of Arc, and the ballet of the Daughter of the Danube, are being played together every night. To enable the public to see the former, BUNN issues" orders" innumerable, trusting to be remunerated by half-price visitors to see the ballet. If a person wishes to find himself among respectable people, he will act wisely to pay for admittance to the pit; in the boxes (though his entrance is free) he stands great chance of being robbed. Such a motley group as we saw assembled there, the other evening, could only be viewed with extreme suspicion. Alas, poor. Drury! By the way, the immense numbers of figurantes who dance nightly on the stage, have so completely worn out the boards, that the carpenter has been applied to for an estimate to lay down a new stage, the performers having sworn that they positively go in fear of their lives. The young ladies, too, of the ballet, have struck for higher wages; in consequence of the wear and tear of shoe-leather. Their desires have been complied with; many of them now receiving sixteen shillings and three-pence halfpenny per week, instead of fifteen shillings-which has placed them on rather a better foot-ing than they

were before.

Haymarket. We are almost tired of recording a continuance of the Love Chace and

plays the principal character.

St. James's. Mr. BRAHAM, the worthy manager of this ill-starred establishment, has been to Birmingham to fulfil an engagement; previously to which, he played Henry Bertram in Guy Mannering, on Monday night. In his absence, the weight of the management fell on HARLEY, and the bewitching Mrs. STIRLING, who is herself a host. We understand Mr. BRAHAM has been losing nearly £50 nightly, since the commencement of the season. is paying rather too dear for his whistle.

This

Olympic.-A new and particularly pleasing burletta has been added this week, to the other favorite stock-pieces. It is entitled the Ring Doves, and affords scope for some excellent acting on the part of Mr. F. MATHEWS and Mr. C. MATHEWS,-the latter most humorously personating the double of the former.BROUGHAM, too, as an Irish footman, is deserving our good word. He possesses considerable humor, and very seldom out-steps the bounds of propriety; a hint that might be taken with advantage by one of our Power-ful actors who plays Irish characters at the Adelphi. Of the fascinating Miss LEE, we would speak, as we have ever done, most highly. There is a finish about her acting, that stamps a character upon whatever she undertakes. In this establishment, she justly ranks second only to Madame VESTRIS-greatly to the annoyance of a certain proud little actress.

Adelphi.-The return of POWER has been the only novelty during the week. He has resumed his old character of Rory O'More, and seems as lively as ever. We must do Mr. LYON (his locum tenens, pro, tem.) the justice to say, that his performance of Rory was very clever, and that he evinced abilities which ought not to be lost sight of by the management.

Surrey.-Benefits are the order of the evening here, just now; therefore we have little Stairs being retained as a leading feature in the to say in the way of criticism. Wapping Old various entertainments, we may justly consider that piece to possess peculiar attractions. It is worth seeing, were it only for the sake of witnessing DAVIDGE's performance of Poor Jack. The houses have been good; and the benefits, for the most part, productive.

Victoria.-The King's Wager, and Wastha, have again been played all through the week; and as they prove attractive, we conclude they will-following the "fashion"-run till Christmas.

Sadler's Wells.-This theatre, we understand, has fallen into the hands of Mr. OsBALDISTON, the charlatan who formerly degraded Covent Garden theatre, by converting the dresscircle into a beer-shop, where the article' was allowed "to be drunk on the premises," and where it was the custom, oftentimes, to smoke a cigar. It is not very difficult, therefore, to foretell what management may be expected here. At present, the house is filled with "orders;" but this system can never answer any good purpose. It serves only to collect a parcel of vagabonds together, who exercise their light-fingered propensities upon the unwary.

Marylebone.-This is another new theatre, which has been recently opened in the neighborhood of Portman Square; and it adds one more to the many proofs already before us, of John Bull being a most merry-hearted, and jovial fellow,-fond of plays, and every thing that appeals to the senses by means of scenic representation. The speculation has, we believe, been entered upon by Mr. HYDE, and he has formed a very respectable company. Among the corps dramatique, we recognised two old favorites of ours,-Mr. MARSHALL, and Miss TREBLE; both formerly of the Queen's. The principal performances of the week have been the nautical drama called Tom Starboard, and the Spare-bed, a humorous farce by Fox COOPER; both which have been rapturously received. Tragedy and comedy are also in request here. Othello was played on Thursday, and the Rivals last night. A new comic pantomime, entitled Harlequin Hunchback, is in rehearsal for Christmas. There being no 'gallery' here, the other part of the house is, in consequence, kept more select than usual.

Queen's. We think our brethren of the press are greatly to blame, for bearing so hard upon the managers of this little theatre; for where, we would ask, can one be so well entertained, and with so great a variety of amusements? On Monday last, we attended to witness the re-appearance of Miss DESBOROUGH, the fair lessee, whose 'confinement' had unfortunately been attended by a relapse,-from which she was on that day announced to be recovered, and to be doing "as well as could be expected." On entering the house at half-past 6, the hour named for the rising of the curtain (the doors having been opened at half-past 5)-we found every corner filled up with people of all nations, tongues, and languages; and if our eyes did not deceive us, we saw one, if not two gentlemen in the boxes, with clean collars, and one young lady with a clean face and neck, -a distinction which seemed to give great offence to the other part of the audience, to whom such luxuries were evidently all but un

known. Being anxious to know of what the performances were to consist, we enquired for a 'bill," but there was not such a thing to be had-" coz," as a little urchin assured us, "nobody voud'nt pay for 'em being printed, and it vos no go,' vithout the tip." This being perfectly satisfactory, as far as it went, we revelled in pleasing anticipation of something marvellous, -nor were we disappointed. The hint given us about the "bills," prepared us not so expect any musicians; we were, therefore, not at all surprised at half-past 7 o'clock, to find the orchestra empty, and the house uproarious. During this interval, a policeman or two, amused themselves and the audience by dancing a fandango, in the Duke of Beaufort's private box, "behind the and one of them "played Punch curtain; all which performances were duly extolled. This over, at exactly 25 minutes to 8 two heads were observed emerging from under the stage, which were shortly followed by the bodies of two individuals looking things unutterable, but very portentous. A third person having made his appearance, an extemporaneous hash was served up in the form of an overture, played on two Jews' harps, and a hurdy gurdy, the audience beating time with their feet. This over, after an awful pause the curtain rose, and disclosed sundry bipeds "looking daggers but using none." They tried to smile, but made a

We

failure of it. In a few moments, Miss DEsEsmeralda, the Gipsy Girl of Notre Dame, and BOROUGH skipped forward, in the dress of her appearance stemmed the rising storm. waited at least another week, before she ventured cannot help thinking that this lady should have please, but evidently labored under considerable forth in public. She made great exertions to bodily weakness; which, from the nature of the performances, must have been greatly encreased before she left the theatre. It hardly seems a month since we last saw her in perfect health; and this period is, we believe, the shortest, usually assigned to persons recovering from so peculiar' an illness. We trust she will soon regain her strength, for she is really a very fascinating actress, and possessed of wonderful animal spirits. It is, perhaps, hardly fair to criticise the performances, on so 'interesting'an occasion, but really the Prompter took 'so prominent a part in the entertainment, that the house was in one continued roar of langhter. It was quite evident that there could have been no rehearsal; for every thing was, as John Reeve would say, in the most glorious confusion. WHO the actors were, we know not; neither do we care,-they may, however, come very aptly under the expressive denomination of walking-sticks."

Printed by J. Eames, 7, Tavistock St., Covent Garden

Published for the Proprietor by GEORGE DENNEY, at the Office, 7, Tavistock St. Covent Garden: sold also by Hetherington, 126, Strand; Strange, 21, and Steill, 20, Paternoster Row; Purkiss, Compton Street; and James Pattie, 4, Brydges Street, Covent Garden.

VOL. I.-No. 35.]

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The older the bird, the more he flatters himself that he is worth catching. He is easily caught, were it worth while; but you have caught nothing, perhaps, when you have got him. Chaff is too valuable, too precious, to be expended wastefully; and because you are not so silly as to throw powder away, he conceives himself to be shot-proof. As nobody tries to catch him, he fondly persuades himself that his own exceeding cunning secures him from capture. "Take me if you can,' chirps he, and goes dodging about the woods as though a flock of golden vultures were pursuing him. He is quite safe. He has not the felicity of being in peril. The young condor, pressed even by vulgar appetite, will not do him the honor of dining upon him. His toughness and antiquity are sure safeguards. He is only not captured because there is nothing captivating about him. But if, by any chance, he hath a tail-feather fit for plucking, or a bone worthy the distinction of being picked, then is your old bird in imminent danger, for you may catch him when you like with half a pinch of chaff. The tender foxling, not arrived at the maturity of slyness, who never tasted chicken of his own stealing, shall take him without a ruffle of his plumage-only by pronouncing its dingy brown to be rich crimson. What flocks of old birds flutter about in society, all sure that they never shall be caged, and all safe until a lure is laid for them! But the longer they live, the less chance have they of avoiding the trap. The older they grow, the slenderer the means of escape. The starched matron is fain to put faith in the compliment which, in her day of youth and grace, she knew to be nonsense. She is now only half-handsome, and can no longer afford to think her eyes less brilliant than she is told they are. She must make up, by exaggerating what is left, for the loss of what is gone. She is not now in a condition to call a fine remark rank flattery; she is obliged to believe, in self-defence. If her mirror will not admit of [No. 20, NEW SERIES.]

mirable judgment, perfect knowledge of the world. Admire these, and, with a dignity which you call Siddonian, she confesses that she is yours. You have only to convert the compliment to her beauty, at twenty, into a tribute to her sagacity at fifty-five. Tell her she is effectually. Admire her penetration, and you will find not to be imposed upon, and you impose upon her her impenetrable. The old bird devoutly believes he is no goose. The grey-headed adventurer, who would not marry at twenty-six, because the lady had only a little beauty and five thousand pounds, is taken in, thirty years afterwards, by a plain widow with a large family instead of an estate. The moralist of threescore is ruined in three months by a figurante; and a man of refinement, fastidious up to seventy-two, "marries his cook." Not caught with chaff! The old bird sniffs it afar off. Not a curate in the kingdom that does not once a-week unite in holy wedlock threescore-and-ten to fourscore, or fourscore to onescore. The ancient gentleman who has seen the world, who is profoundly experienced, and much too deep to be the dupe of an age so shallow as this, is to be won by an admiring glance at the brilliancy of his knee-buckle; praise his very pigtail, and you may lead him by it. None are so easily taken in as the "knowing ones." The knowing one is generally an egregious ninny. The man who loses his last shilling at Doncaster, is no other than he who was sure of winning; who could prove by his betting-book that he must win by backing chaff against the field. He is a fine specimen of the family of the Oldbirds. So is the careful, cautious wight, the original Master Sure-card, the man of many savings, who in his old age falls in love with a loan; who dies in prison from the pressure of foreign bonds, or drowns himself in the New Canal by way of securing what he calls his share. The genuine old bird is a pigeon.-From a Series of Popular Fallacies in the New Monthly Magazine.

NumerICALLY SWEET.-Mrs. Honey has seceded from co-partnership with Mr. Cockerton, and is now receiving £40 per week salary! this is exactly £6 13s. 4d. per night, according to "Cocker"-ton.