Sumter, all we can do is to suppose the Major | judges sat in banco to hear appeals, etc., for the to be surveying the ruins from James Island counsel opening the cause to hand up to the Chief before going on board the steamer for New Justice the whole package of briefs for distribuYork. Our exhibition is particularly well suited tion among his associates. One morning Brothfor schools. Moral, instructive, and cheap-er L, having spent the whole night convivthat's what schools want. In making my ar- ially at cards, came into court with his bundle rangements ahead I call upon the schools and of briefs, and the cause being called which he contract with them. Five cents each in New was to argue, and forgetting that the venue was England. No getting any more there; ten or changed, laid his package on the desk before the fifteen cents any where else." Chief Justice, and, after a moment's pause, solemnly and emphatically said, "Cut !”

A Cape Cod clergyman one Sabbath had prayed
most earnestly for rain. He entreated the Lord
to "uncork the bottles of heaven, and send down
the refreshing showers." The drought had last-
ed through August and a part of September.
Tuesday morning the line storm began, and con-
tinued with great violence till Friday, flooding
the country, and sweeping off bridges in all di-
rections. Saturday night it set in to rain again,
and Sabbath morning it was still pouring down.
This time the prayer was as follows: "O Lord,
we recently took occasion to entreat Thee to un-
cork the bottles of heaven, and send down the
refreshing showers, but we did not mean that the
Corks should be thrown away!" Mr. Starr fol-
lowed with a story of "Parson Howe," of Milton,
Connecticut. On a similar occasion, if not dur-
ing the same drought, he petitioned for relief in
these words: "O Lord, we want rain very much.
The rye is suffering prodigiously. Of corn we
shall not have half a crop.
As for the potatoes,
it is all up with them; and there's that grass of
Deacon Comstock's, it is as red as a fox's tail."

THERE were very many people, in the late political campaign in this State, who placed themselves on the independent ground concisely described in the following paragraph:

During the canvass in Pennsylvania for county and borough officers, as well as for members of Congress, a certain Democrat was asked by a friend how he stood on the free-school question. Not being well posted, and fearing some "catch," he replied:

“Well, I stand a nuisance in this champaigne.” There were a good many neutrals of the same sort, on both sides, in our last "champaigne."

to her father, taking the child; that the plaintiff, thinking his paternal rights violated, applied to a lawyer to get redress; whereupon suit in replevin was instituted. The sheriff took the child without difficulty, when it occurred to him that the next step was to have an appraisement of the property. This appearing to be somewhat difficult, he persuaded all the parties to come with him to town, bringing the property with him, where the matter was amicably settled, "as per agreement on file."

We note the precedent for the guidance of the bar of New York.

In the way of poetical paraphrase could any thing be more beautiful than the following, on this sentence in Deuteronomy, xxxiv. 5: "So Moses the servant of the Lord died there in the land of Moab, according to the word of the Lord;" the literal rendering of the last words being, "by the mouth of the Lord."

It is thus rendered by an old English poet:
"Softly his fainting head he lay

Upon his Maker's breast;
His Maker kissed his soul away,
And laid his flesh to rest."

JUST at this particular season, when innocent festivity abounds, or ought to abound, in every household, the Drawer writes down for the general edification the following, which, many years ago, was written on the wall of an old way-side inn not ten thousand miles from Connecticut:

"Here's to Pands pen

Dasoci! al Hou ?-Rinhar
M, Les, Smirt: Ha! (N. D. F.)
Unle, Tfri; end, shi! Pre,
I, Gnbe, J, U, Stand, K. Indan
Devils!!! Peako, Fn (one)."

We estimate that an accurate description of Which may be "sugared off" as follows:

what really good pork is may be found in the following notice, the original of which is before us:

PORK-I hav Still to Spare a few pounds of Old pork, some Salted and some Smoked, Each as good as Ever greased any man's Cheek or Chin! JSENNETT, N. Y., November 20th, 1869.

AN Ohio correspondent who recently had occasion to look over the old records of one of the legal document, which shows what can be done counties of that State, came across the following under a writ of replevin : COURT OF COMMON PLEAS, JOHN WILKINS

WM. BARNARD

County, 1837.

In Replevin, Damages $1000.

and REBECCA WILKINS. The Clerk of the above Court will issue a writ of to wit: one male child about fourteen months old, named James Hamilton Wilkins, son of said plaintiff, and indorse, "Suit brought for wrongfully detaining said child, or property, to the plaintiff's dam- | MJ, Att'y for Pl'ff.

age $1000,"

The above-named John Wilkins makes oath and says that he has good right to the possession of the child, goods, and chattels described above, and that they are wrongfully detained by said defendants; and that said child, goods, and chattels were not taken in execution in any judgment against the said plaintiff, nor by virany writ of replevin or any other mesne or final process whatever issued against him.

tue of

JOHN WILKINS.

Sworn to, etc., etc. The curiosity of our correspondent being excited, he ascertained that the plaintiff and his wife had had a "breeze;" she thereupon "sloped"

"Here stop and spend a social hour

In harmless mirth and fun;
Let friendship reign, be just and kind,
And evil speak of none."

As a matter of duty, and at the same time with a feeling of pleasure, we welcome to the Drawer a merchant of Boston, who, visiting this the standing of a person who had applied to him city, took occasion to make inquiry in regard to

for credit, and he was assured that the party was doing a good business, was a member of the Common Council, etc.

"But," said the persevering Bostonian, "is he honest ?"

"Honest!" exclaimed the interrogated. "Why, his honesty has been proved better than that of any man in New York, for he has been twice tried for stealing, and escaped both times!"

A CORRESPONDENT at Christiana, Pennsylvania, sends us the following of an aged negress, very pious, an inveterate smoker, who dropped in to pay a passing visit to a neighbor, who was equally well known as a temperance man and a hater of tobacco. On sitting down the old aunty pulled from her pocket a long pipe and commenced smoking, to the infinite disgust of her host. The man maintained his composure several minutes; but the fumes became too powerful for him, and, rising, he said:

66

Aunt Chloe, do you think you are a Chris

tian?"

FROM Over sea we have two small jokes anent the river which flows into the harbor of Liverpool: A wag, crossing to Woodside Ferry, and observing the muddiness of the water, remarked that Shakspeare was quite correct in stating that "the quality of Mersey is not strained." A Liverpool pilot, adrift in the Irish Sea during a dense fog, is said to have fervently uttered two lines from Pope's well-known hymn :

"That Mersey I to others showed,
That Mersey show to me."

A CORRESPONDENT at Pumphrey's Landing, Washington Territory, sends us the following extract from a report of the proceedings of the Legislature of Oregon, in reference to the "new element" that is coming among us:

A BILL TO DISCOURAGE CASTE.

Be it enacted by the Legislative Assembly of the State

of Oregon:

SECTION 1. That it shall not be lawful for any male inhabitant of this State over the age of fifteen years to wear his hair in a queue plaited of greater length than six inches, or shave a portion of the scalp, without first obtaining a license therefor, to be issued by the clerks of the several counties and delivered to the sheriff of the same, signed with his name and seal of office. Such licenses shall be filed and delivered to every person applying therefor upon the payment of ten dollars ($10) gold coin, which license shall be good for thirty days from the date thereof, and be renewed by an indorsement on the back thereof made by the sheriff, and the payment of an additional ten dollars for each succeeding month such person may desire a license.

How is that for a flank movement on "John Chinaman?"

THE following is contributed by a clerical friend in Boston. He has never seen it in print. It was told to him nearly fifty years ago by a gentleman who spoke of it as having occurred within his own knowledge:

On returning home the old lady called the chairman into the hall, and while hunting up the exact change to pay him for his services, asked him how he liked the sermon.

"Sorra a bit did I like it, ma'am," replied Pat. "Why so?" asked the lady. "I thought it an excellent discourse."

"Faix, thin, ma'am, if it was, what else did he do but blaggaard me native town all through it? Didn't he till ivery body that the Fermoy people was foolish and sottish, and hadn't the laste taste of good in 'em? And sure, isn't Fermoy as dacent a little town as there is in Ireland, and has a bank in it?"

THERE is some drollery always going on around the markets. The following is the first instance, in the annals of the Drawer, where a lobster has been successfully introduced: A man who was fond of good lobster, was looking wistfully at a basket of them, with his dog by his side, while another by-stander was sticking the end of his cane into one of the disengaged claws of a big fellow at the top.

"How he does hold on!" said the man with the cane.

"Yes," responded the man with the dog; "but it's because he dents the cane, and his claws won't stick on the wood. But he couldn't hold on to a critter in that way. When a lobster feels any thing givin' he stops pinchin'."

"Guess not," said the owner of the basket. "You put your dog's tail in that ere claw, and you'll see whether he'll hold on or not."

No sooner said than done. The man lifted up his dog, dropped his tail into the open claw, which closed instanter, and the dog ran off, howling, at the top of his speed.

"Hello!" exclaimed the owner; "whistle back your dog. Blast him! he's running off with the lobster!"

"Whistle back your lobster!" rejoined the other. "That dog ain't comin' back; that dog's in pain; I can't git him to come near me when he's in pain."

Poor dog! he had to go home!

Apropos of Sedan. When sedan chairs were in common use, about half a century ago, a pious old Methodist lady, residing in Dublin, engaged a sturdy chairman and his assistant to bear her to her favorite chapel. The evening being stormy, the chair was deposited in the vestibule, and the chairmen took seats just inside the door of the chapel to await the close of the services. IN "The Genial Showman," published by the The preacher took for his text, Jeremiah, iv. 22: Harpers, wherein Mr. E. P. Hingston very amus"For my people is foolish, they have not known ingly sketches the various odd characters he enme; they are sottish children, and they have countered during his "management" of Artenone understanding: they are wise to do evil, mus Ward, he mentions a "party" whom he but to do good they have no knowledge." Be- met in a stage between Marysville and Sacraing from the north of Ireland, there was a slight mento, who, from certain remarks which he touch of Doric in his speech, and he pronounced made, seemed to have a prejudice against lawthe first clause of the text thus: "For moi peo-yers. ple is foolish."

"Lawyers are mean cusses!" he exclaimed,

with bitterness. "I'd drown the whole bilin' of
them in the Yuba, if I had my way. Do you
know what happened to them in Georgia, whar I
come from? Well, some one introduced a bill
into the Legislature to tax all jackasses ten dol-
lars a year.
One of our legislators moved an
amendment. He wished lawyers and doctors to
be put in the same act. Our Legislature was in
high spirits that day, and wanted a little mischief.
So, when the amendment was put, they carried
it, and passed the bill. They've tried to rub it
out since, but they can't do it. We've got it on
our statute books. Just as sure as I'm driving
you down to the Yuba, the act stands good in old
Georgia-all jackasses, doctors, and lawyers have
to pay up ten dollars a year. It's hefty on the
lawyers, but it's so !"

It used to be thought dangerous for a subject "to witness the undress moments of a king;" and when dignitaries do relax it is desirable that their companions should be discreet. There is an English nobleman of jovial turn, Lord Fitzhardinge, who lately made a speech at an agricultural dinner, and in the course of it became quite racy.

printer named North, who would occasionally drink too much. One evening, after having struggled with too many drinks, a friend advised him to go over to the prayer-meeting in the Y. M. C. A. building, and ask some of the members to pray for him. The suggestion struck him favorably, and he proceeded to act upon it, but accidentally wandered into the gymnasium, instead of the prayer-meeting. Steadying himself, and looking around, he said, "They told me to come over here to a prayer-meeting, but I've got into a circus!"

As a "war anecdote" how is this? During the “troubles" a young Confederate miss was passing through one of the hospitals, when it was remarked that a prisoner, a lieutenant, had died that morning.

"Oh, where is he? Let me see him! Let me kiss him for his mother!" exclaimed the maiden.

The attendant led her into an adjoining ward, when, discovering Lieutenant H- of the Fifth Kansas, lying fast asleep on his hospital couch, and thinking to have a little fun, he pointed him out to the girl. She sprang forward, and bending over him, said:

"Oh, you dear lieutenant, let me kiss you for your mother!"

"The Bishop of Gloucester and Bristol," said his lordship, "is fond of billiards. [Laughter.] He was staying with me last autumn, and he was playing a game of billiards on Saturday night. What was her surprise when the awakened He had the best of the game. [Laughter.] I "corpse" ardently clasped her in his arms, rethink it was 47 to 45; and he was 47 when the turned the salute, and exclaimed: clock struck twelve. He said to me, 'Could you "Never mind the old lady, miss; go it on not put the billiard-room clock back five min-your own account. I haven't the slightest obutes?' [Loud laughter.] I said I would put it back ten minutes if he liked, and give him a glass of gin-and-water afterward." [Roars of laughter.]

jection."

QUITE useless to attempt to get the weathergauge of a Second-Advent brother. In Michigan, for instance, dwells a worthy minister of that persuasion, who is the fortunate possessor of eighty acres of land. While conversing recently concerning the nearness of the Final Day, and the necessity of forgetting the temporal in the infinite, a good Presbyterian brother sug

Bless us! what a putting in of the foot was there! It ought in justice to be added that, although the bishop is also a good horseman and great rower, he is at the same time known to be one of the most learned and hard-working prelates, and best biblical critics, in England, being in manliness a true type of the "muscular Chris-gested, since the end was so near, that Btian."

FROM a letter written in mid-ocean comes the following reminiscence of Lyman Beecher: In the early part of the present century, when Dr. Beecher wrote and preached his famed discourse on "Dueling," at the time the heart of the country was stirred with the death of Hamilton by the bullet of Burr, one of the learned divines of New York said to another:

"Who is this Lyman Beecher that can write and preach after this fashion? I never heard of him before."

"He has been down at East Hampton, on Long Island, for eight years, steeping in Edwards," was the reply.

AMONG the many resources for moral and physical culture, none is more deservedly popular than our Young Men's Christian Associations. In this city and in Washington there are attached to these institutions gymnasiums furnished with every appliance for developing physical power; and at hours when young men are usually at leisure they may be seen making use of the bars, ropes, ladders, dumb - bells, etc. Not long since there worked in Washington a

should give him forty acres of his land, for which not only should his earnest thanks be given, but the Lord would impute his generous deed unto him for righteousness. "Besides," added he, "what is the use of declining, when the change would only benefit me a little while?"

"No, Sir," replied the good man of the Second Adv.-"no, Sir! the Lord has said to me, occupy till I come,' and I intend to do it!" He's doing it yet.

No man has greater popularity in the lectureroom than Gough, and no one has more faithfully obeyed the famous maxim, "The three great rules ever to be observed in oratory are, 1st, Action! 2d, Action!! 3d, Action!!!" He is always acting and in action. Of himself he writes:

I

"I have been criticised severely for the ungracefulness and violence of my gestures. do not wish to deprecate criticism. I know I am ungraceful and awkward. I once heard a boy say to his companion, as they came out from the lecture-room where I had been speaking,

"Jimmy, did you see him go it with his feet?' "I never studied the graces of action or gesture; probably I should be more graceful if I