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The very remedy, however fure,

Springs from the mischief it intends to cure,
And favage in its principle appears,

Tried, as it should be, by the fruit it bears.
'Tis hard, indeed, if nothing will defend

Mankind from quarrels but their fatal end;
That now and then an hero muft decease,
That the furviving world may live in peace.
Perhaps at last close fcrutiny may fhow
The practice daftardly, and mean, and low;
That men engage in it compell'd by force:
And fear, not courage, is its proper fource.
The fear of tyrant custom, and the fear

Left fops fhould cenfure us, and fools should fneer.

At least to trample on our Maker's laws,

And hazard life for any or no cause,

To rush into a fixt eternal ftate

Out of the very flames of rage and hate,
Or fend another fhiv'ring to the bar
With all the guilt of fuch unnatʼral war,

Whatever use may urge, or honour plead,

On reafon's verdict is a madman's deed.
Am I to fet my life upon a throw,
Because a bear is rude and furly? No-
A moral, fenfible, and well-bred man
Will not affront me, and no other can.
Were I empow'r'd to regulate the lifts,
They should encounter with well-loaded fifts;
A Trojan combat would be fomething new.
Let DARES beat ENTELLUS black and blue;
Then each might show, to his admiring friends,
In honourable bumps his rich amends,

And carry, in contufions of his fkull,

A fatisfactory receipt in full.

A story, in which native humour reigns,

Is often useful, always entertains;

A graver fact, enlifted on your fide,
May furnish illuftration, well applied;

But fedentary weavers of long tales

Give me the fidgets, and my patience fails.

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'Tis the most afinine employ on earth,

To hear them tell of parentage and birth,
And echo converfations, dull and dry,
Embellish'd with-He faid, and So faid I.
At ev'ry interview their route the fame,
The repetition makes attention lame;
We bustle up with unfuccessful speed,
And in the faddeft part cry-Droll indeed!
The path of narrative with care pursue,
Still making probability your clue;
On all the vestiges of truth attend,
And let them guide you to a decent end.
Of all ambitions man may entertain,
The worst that can invade a fickly brain
Is that which angles hourly for furprise,
And baits its hook with prodigies and lies.
Credulous infancy, or age as weak,

Are fitteft auditors for fuch to feek,

Who to please others will themselves difgrace;
Yet please not, but affront you to your face.

A great retailer of this curious ware,

Having unloaded and made many stare,

Can this be true?-an arch obferver cries.

Yes, (rather mov'd) I faw it with these eyes!
Sir! I believe it on that ground alone;

I could not, had I feen it with my own.
A tale fhould be judicious, clear, fuccinct;
The language plain, and incidents well link'd;
Tell not as new what ev'ry body knows;
And, new or old, ftill haften to a close;
There, cent'ring in a focus round and neat,
Let all your rays of information meet.
What neither yields us profit or delight

Is like a nurfe's lullaby at night;

Guy Earl of Warwick and fair Eleanore,

Or giant killing Jack, would please me more.
The pipe, with folemn interpofing puff,
Makes half a sentence at a time enough;

The dozing fages drop the drowsy ftrain,

Then pause, and puff—and speak, and pause again.

Such often, like the tube they so admire,

Important triflers! have more smoke than fire. Pernicious weed! whofe fcent the fair annoys,

Unfriendly to fociety's chief joys,

Thy worst effect is banishing for hours
The sex whose presence civilizes our's:
Thou art, indeed, the drug a gard'ner wants,
To poison vermin that infest his plants;
But are we so to wit and beauty blind,
As to defpife the glory of our kind,

And fhow the fofteft minds and faireft forms
As little mercy as he grubs and worms?
They dare not wait the riotous abuse,

Thy thirst-creating steams at length produce,
When wine has giv'n indecent language birth,
And forced the flood-gates of licentious mirth;
For fea-born Venus her attachment shows,
Still to that element from which she rose,
And, with a quiet which no fumes disturb,
Sips meek infufions of a milder herb.

VOL. I.

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