244 DOG-GREL VERSES, BY A POOR BLIND. My next was an Esquimaux dog, A dog that my bones ache to talk on, On cold frosty days He picked out the slides for a walk on. Bijou was a lady-like dog, But vexed me at night not a little, When tea-time was come She would not go home, Her tail had once trailed a tin kettle. I once had a sort of a Shock, And kissed a street post like a brother, And lost every tooth In learning this truth One blind cannot well lead another. A terrier was far from a trump, He had one defect, and a thorough, 'Od rabbit the cur! Without going into the Borough. My next was Dalmatian, the dog! Between carriage wheels, Till I came upon boards that were spiky. The next that I had was from Cross, And once was a favourite spaniel With Nero, now dead, And so I was led Right up to his den like a Daniel. A mongrel I tried, and he did, Endangers the blind, The breed is so fond of a crossing. A setter was quite to my taste, In alleys or streets broad or narrow, A very dead set, At a very dead horse in a barrow. I once had a dog that went mad, And sorry I was that I got him; It came to a run, And a man with a gun Peppered me when he ought to have shot him. My profits have gone to the dogs, My trade has been such a deceiver, Is a mere losing game, Unless I can find a Retriever. THE KANGAROOS. A FABLE. A PAIR of married kangaroos As all the little K.'s just then are A twist in each parental muzzle And yet they had no squeamish carings For they had no armorial bearings. Howbeit they're not the last on earth That might indulge in pride of birth; Whoe'er has seen their infant young Bob in and out their mother's pokes, Would own, with very ready tongue, They are not born like common folks Well, thus the serious subject stood, It kept the old pair watchful nightly, Debating for young hopeful's good, That he might earn his livelihood, And go through life (like them) uprightly. Arms would not do at all; no, marry, And as for being mercantile He was not formed for over-reaching. why there still fate ill-starred him, And plainly from the bar debarred him : A doctor who would ever fee him? In music he could scarce engage, For just suppose A lady chose To ask him for a yard of ferret! A gardener digging up his beds, They paused and glanced upon his paws. By day they seemed to get no nearer, And in the night Of course they saw their way no clearer! Or hinder elbows if you please It came no thought was ever brighter! In weighing every why and whether, They jumped upon it both together "Let's make the imp a short-hand writer!' MORAL. I wish all human parents so Would argue what their sons are fit for; Some would-be critics that I know Would be in trades they have more wit for. |