She might have run against Lord Milton,
And still have stared at deeds in oil,
But ah! her picture-joy to spoil,
She came full butt on Mr. Hilton.

The Keeper mute, with staring eyes,
Like a lay-figure for surprise,
At last thus stammered out “How now?
Woman — where, woman, is your ticket,
That ought to let you through our wicket?”
Says woman, “ Where is David's Cow?”
Said Mr. H- , with expedition,
There's no Cow in the Exhibition.
“No Cow!” – but here her tongue in verity,
Set off with steam and rail celerity —

“ No Cow! there ain't no Cow, then the more 's

the shame and pity Hang you and the R. A.'s, and all the Hanging

Committee ! No Cow — but hold your tongue, for you needn't

talk to me — You can't talk up the Cow, you can't, to where it

ought to be — I have n't seen a picture high or low, or any


Or in any of the rooms to be compared with

David's Cow? You may talk of your Landseers, and of your

Coopers, and your Wards,

Why hanging is too good for them, and yet here

they are on cords ! They’re only fit for window frames, and shutters,

and street doors, David will paint 'em any day at Red Lions or

Blue Boars, — Why Morland was a fool to him, at a little pig or

sow It's really hard it ain't hung up - I could cry

about the Cow ! But I know well what it is, and why — they're

jealous of David's fame, But to vent it on the Cow, poor thing, is a cruelty

and a shame. Do you think it might hang by and by, if you

cannot hang it now? David has made a party up, to come and see his 1 Cow. If it only hung three days a week, for an exam

ple to the learners, Why can't it hang up, turn about, with that pic

ture of Mr. Turner's ? Or do you think from Mr. Etty, you need appre

hend a row, If now and then you cut him down to hang up

David's Cow ? I can't think where their tastes have been, to not

have such a creature, Although I say, that should not say, it was pret

tier than Nature ;

It must be hung -- and shall be hung, for Mr.

H- I vow, I daren't take home the catalogue, unless it's got

the Cow! As we only want it to be seen, I should not so

much care, If it was only round the stone man's neck, a-com

ing up the stair. Or down there in the marble room where all the

figures stand, Where one of them three Graces might just hold it

in her hand Or may be Bailey's Charity the favour would

allow, It would really be a charity to hang up David's

cow. We haven't no where else to go if you don't hang

it here, The Water-Colour place allows no oilman to ap

pear — And the British Gallery sticks to Dutch, Teniers,

and Gerrard Douw, And the Suffolk Gallery will not do — it's not a

Suffolk Cow : I wish you'd seen him painting her, he hardly

took his meals Till she was painted on the board correct from

head to heels ; His heart and soul was in his Cow, and almost

made him shabby,

He hardly whipped the boys at all, or helped to

nurse the babby. And when he had her all complete and painted

over red, He got so grand, I really thought him going off

his head. Now hang it, Mr. Hilton, do just hang it any

how, Poor David, he will hang himself, unless you

hang his Cow. And if it's unconvenient and drawn too big by

half David shan't send next year except a very little


And Half isend nex


“Nothing venture, nothing have." — OLD PROVERB. “ Every Indiaman has at least two mates."


My hair is brown, my eyes are blue,
And reckoned rather bright;
I'm shapely, if they tell me true,
And just the proper height;
My skin has been admired in verse,

And called as fair as day —
If I am fair, so much the worse,
I'm going to Bombay!


At school I passed with some éclât;
I learned my French in France ;
De Wint gave lessons how to draw,
And D’Egville how to dance ; —
Crevelli taught me how to sing,
And Cramer how to play —
It really is the strangest thing —
I'm going to Bombay!

III. I've been to Bath and Cheltenham Wells, But not their springs to sip To Ramsgate — not to pick up shells, To Brighton — not to dip. I've toured the Lakes, and scoured the coast From Scarboro' to Torquay — But tho' of time I've made the most, I'm going to Bombay!


By Pa and Ma I’m daily told
To marry now's my time,
For though I'm very far from old
I'm rather in my prime.

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