THIS fool had got a lucky bit,
And people fancy'd he had wit:
Two Gods their skill in mufick try'd,
And both chofe Midas to decide;
He against Phabus' harp decreed,
And gave it for Pan's oaten reed:
The God of wit, to fhew his grudge,
Clapt affes ears upon the Judge;
A goodly pair, erect and wide,

Which he could neither gild, nor hide.

AND now the virtue of his hands
Was loft among Pactolus' fands,
Against whose torrent while he swims,
The golden fcurf peels off his limbs :
Fame spreads the news, and people travel
From far, to gather golden gravel;
Midas, expos'd to all their jeers,
Had loft his art, and kept his ears.

THIS tale inclines the gentle reader,

To think upon a certain leader;
To whom, from Midas down, defcends
That virtue in the fingers ends:
What else by perquifites are meant,
By penfions, bribes, and three per cent?
By places and commissions fold;
And turning dung itself to gold?
By starving in the midft of ftore,

As t'other Midas did before?

NONE

NONE e'er did modern Midas chufe
Subject or patron of his muse,
But found him thus their merit fçan,
That Phoebus muft give place to Pan:
He values not the Poet's praise,

Nor will exchange his * plumbs for bays:
To Pan alone rich misers call,

And there's the jeft, for Pan is ALL:
Here English wits will be to feek,
Howe'er 'tis all one in the Greek.

BESIDES, it plainly now appears,

Our Midas too hath asses ears.;
Where every fool his mouth applies,
And whispers in a thousand lies
Such grofs delufions could not pafs,
Thro' any ears, but of an ass.

;

Bur gold defiles with frequent touch; There's nothing fouls the hands so much : And scholars give it for the cause

Of British Midas' dirty paws;

Which while the Senate

ftrove to fcowr,

They wafht away the Chymick pow'r.
While, he his utmoft ftrength apply'd,
To fwim against this pop'lar tide.
The golden fpoils flew off apace;
Here. fell a penfion, there a place:
The torrent, merciless, imbibes
Commiffions, perquifites, and bribes;

* A cant word for 100,000 1.

VOL. II.

G

By

By their own weight, funk to the bottom

Much good may't do 'em, that have caught 'um.
And Midas now neglected ftands,

With affes ears, and dirty bands.

The FAGGOT.

Written in the Year 1713, when the Queen's Minifters were quarrelling among themselves.

Ο

BSERVE the dying father speak:

Try lads, can you this bundle break;

Then bids the youngest of the fix.
Take up a well bound heap of fticks.
They thought it was an old man's maggot;
And ftrove by turns to break the faggot;
In vain; the complicated wands

Were much too strong for all their hands.
See, faid the fire, how foon 'tis done :
Then took and broke them one by one.
So ftrong you'll be, in friendship ty'd;
So quickly broke, if you divide.
Keep close then, boys, and never quarrel,
Here ends the fable and the moral.

THIS tale may be apply'd in few words
To treasurers, comptrollers, ftewards,
And others, who in folemn fort
Appear with flender wands at court:

Net

Not firmly join'd to keep their ground,
But lashing one another round :

While wife men think they ought to fight
With quarter ftaffs, inftead of white;
Or Constable with staff of peace

Should come, and make the clatt'ring cease
Which now disturbs the QUEEN and court,
And gives the Whigs and rabble sport.

In history we never found

The Confuls fafces were unbound;
Thofe Romans were too wife to think on't
Except to lafh fome grand delinquent.
How would they blush to hear it said,
The Pretor broke the Conful's head?:
Or Conful, in his purple gown,
Came up, and knock'd the Pretor down.

COME Courtiers: Every man his stick: + Lord Treasurer; for once be quick : And that they may the closer cling,

Take

your

blue ribbon for a string.

Come trimming Harcourt, bring your mace;
And fqueeze it in, or quit your place :
Dispatch, or elfe that rafcal || Northey,
Will undertake to do it for thee:

A bundle of rods, or small sticks, carried before the Confuls at Rome.

ROBERT Earl of OXFORD.

Lord Chancellor.

Sir EDWARD NORTHEY, Attorney General

brought in by the Lord HARCOURT; yet very defirous of the Great Seal.

G 2

And,

And, be affur'd, the court will find him
Prepared to leap o'er fticks, or bind 'em.

To make the bundle ftrong and safe, Great Ormond lend thy gen'ral's staff: And, if the Crofier could be cramm'd in, A Fig for Lechmere, King and Hambden ; You'll then defy the strongest Whig, With both his hands to bend a twig; Though with united ftrength they all pull: From Somers down to ‡ Craggs and Walpole.

JAMES BUTLER, Duke of ORMOND, then Captain-General, who left England in the year 1714, and lived at Avignon in France, where he died without iffue in 1746. His corpfe was brought to England, and interred in Westminster-Abbey.

+ Lord SOMERS, who had been, at different times, Lord Chancellor and Prefident of the council.

JAMES CRAGGS, who hath since been Secretary

of State.

S ROBERT WALPOLE, Efq; Prime Minifter of State, for above 20 years, to King GEORGE I. and II. Imade Knight of the Bath May 1725, and Knight of the Garter May 1726, created Earl of ORFORD 1742, and died 1745.

HORACE