She had used it for drying Her bright eyes while crying, And blowing her nose, as her Beau talk'd of " dying!" Now the Duke, who had seen it so lately adorn her, And bounced into her room, Crying, "So, Ma'am, I find I've some cause to be jealous; Look here!-here's a proof you run after the fellows! -Now take up that pen,-if it's bad choose a better,— And write, as I dictate, this moment a letter To Monsieur-you know who!" The Lady look'd blue; But replied with much firmness Hang me if I do!" De Guise grasped her wrist And pinch'd it, and gave it so painful a twist, That his hard, iron gauntlet the flesh went an inch in,— She did not mind death, but she could not stand pinching; So she sat down and wrote This polite little note: "Dear Mister St. Megrin, The Chiefs of the League in This evening at nine; I shall, soon after ten, Slip away from the men, And you'll find me up stairs in the drawing-room then; Come up the back way, or those impudent thieves Of Servants will see you; Yours, CATHERINE OF CLEVES." She directed and sealed it, all pale as a ghost, St. Megrin had almost jumped out of his skin Then began it anew, And thought it almost too good news to be true.— And a hood over that, With a cloak to disguise him, and make him look fat; So great his impatience, from half after four He was waiting till Ten at De Guise's back-door. When he heard the great clock of St. Genevieve chime He ran up the back staircase six steps at a time; He had scare made his bow, He hardly knew how, When alas! and alack! There was no getting back, For the drawing-room door was bang'd to with a whack ;— In vain he applied To the handle and tried, Somebody or other had locked it outside! And the Duchess in agony mourn'd her mishap, “We are caught like a couple of rats in a trap.” Now the Duchess's Page, About twelve years of age, For so little a boy was remarkably sage; And, just in the nick, to their joy and amazement, Popp'd the Gas-lighter's ladder close under the casement. But all would not do,— Though St. Megrin got through The window, below stood De Guise and his crew, And though never man was more brave than St. Megrin, Yet fighting a score is extremely fatiguing; He thrust carte and tierce Uncommonly fierce, But not Belzebub's self could their cuirasses pierce, While his doublet and hose, Being holiday clothes, Were soon cut through and through from his knees to his nose. Still an old crooked sixpence the Conjuror gave him That confounded De Guise Came behind with the "fogle" that caused all this breeze, Whipp'd it tight round his neck, and, when backward he'd jerk'd him, The rest of the rascals jump'd on him and Burk'd him. The poor little Page too himself got no quarter, but Was served the same way, And was found the next day With his heels in the air and his head in the water-butt. Catherine of Cleves Roar'd" Murder!" and "Thieves!" From the window above While they murder'd her love; Till, finding the rogues had accomplish'd his slaughter, She drank Prussic acid without any water, And died like a Duke and a Duchess's daughter! MORAL. Take warning, ye Fair, from this tale of the Bard's, When alone in your room shut the door close, and lock it; Above all,- KEEP YOUR HANDKERCHIEF SAFE IN YOUR POCKET! Lest you too should stumble, and Lord Leveson Gower, he Be call'd on, sad poet!— to tell your sad story! It was in the summer of 1838 that a party from Tappington reached the metropolis with a view of witnessing the coronation of their youthful Queen, whom God long preserve! — This purpose they were fortunate enough to accomplish by the purchase of a peer's tickets, from a stationer in the Strand, who was enabled so to dispose of some greatly to the indignation of the hereditary Earl Marshal. How Mr. Barney managed to insinuate himself into the Abbey remains a mystery; his characteristic modesty and address doubtless assisted him, for there he unquestionably was. The result of his observations were thus communicated to his associates in the Servant's Hall upon his return, to the infinite delectation of Mademoiselle Pauline, over a Cruiskeen of his own concocting. 289 MR. BARNEY MAGUIRE'S ACCOUNT OF THE CORONATION. Air "The Groves of Blarney." ОCH! the Coronation! what celebration And the Duke of Leinster, all in order did repair! 'Twas there you'd see the New Polishemen Making a skrimmage at half after four, And the Lords and Ladies, and the Miss O'Gradys Their pillows scorning, that self-same morning And gould, and jewels, and rich di'monds bright. With Giniral Dullbeak.-Och! 'twas mighty fine To see how asy bould Corporal Casey, With his swoord drawn, prancing, made them kape the line. Then the Guns' alarums, and the King of Arums, |